Cross-cultural sarcasm, or is it misunderstanding?

** Edited 24 December 2006 **

I'll keep this post brief, as all the details remain to be worked out. Net result: my christmas plans are up in the air. I assumed I would be spending the holiday with my roommate & family. However, I didn't explicitly ask permission to join them (some conversations that I thought implied I was invited were held, but the communication was missed), so plans were made that did not include me. Once I did express my interest, it was too late for the family to change their plans to accommodate me. At my roommate's birthday party tonight, I asked his sister point-blank if it is better for me to not come to their house, and she only shrugged. I admit being frustrated by learning all of this at the last minute, with little chance of making alternate plans. Perhaps it is a diagnosis of the difficulty of cross-cultural exchange: inviting a stranger into your home, effectively invading your family's personal time, is a huge step for a family, particularly when it comes at the last minute. I believe I grossly underestimated this sacrifice, expecting hospitality when I should instead have asked for it.

Anyway, I am taking things as they come. My roommate is going to ask his parents tomorrow if I can come, but I'm not very optimistic - especially if his sister remains against it. We'll see what ends up working out. If I don't go to Paternion, I will email/call around to some friends from hauskreis to see if they would host me. No one wants to spend Christmas alone, but it's better than being somewhere that causes my hosts to feel uncomfortable because of my presence.

Any advice here? And if I don't go, what do I do with the presents I bought for the family? Take them back?!

Peace, and merry christmas, however we end up spending it. I am reminded during this week that the main point of the holiday requires no interpersonal interaction at all, only pondering of significance and a search for meaning:

1 In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. 2 (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) 3 And everyone went to his own town to register.

4 So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5 He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. 6 While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, 7 and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

8 And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. 9 An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. 10 But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. 12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
14 "Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

15 When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, "Let's go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about."

16 So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. 17 When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18 and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. 19 But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. 20 The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.